Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Living in the here and now

I'm having a hard time doing this.

I keep thinking "once I get here, once we move here, once *this* happens" yada, yada, yada....blah, blah, blah......

We've all heard it, we've most likely all done it.

So here I am, facing my third move in less than a year. While I can definitely see the hand of the Lord in ALL of this, it is *still* hard with four small children. Even though I know we are following His will, I still find myself falling into self-pity at times. ick.

When that happens, I tend to just maintain. I do the basics around the house: dishes and laundry. I keep things picked up, but not necessarily all that clean. My children do basic homeschooling. With Kindergarten, it's really not *that* intensive - just three days a week.

So I'm trying to find my groove (no, I'm not trying to be Stella or anything). I'm trying to figure out what GOD desires for me to do. Somedays I honestly *do* believe it is just maintaining. Somedays though, it could be so much more.

The thing is, I could potentially be right here, in this same place, in ten years. In ten years, I could be nursing a baby with lots of littles (plus some olders ones, I know). Yet when I think about our life in ten years, THIS is not what I want. I do not want to just be maintaining - I honestly want to thrive. THRIVE!!

The Prayer of Jabez is on my heart. I finally got around to reading the small book while at my folks house. Of course I want His blessings - today! Yes, I want my territory increased - although sometimes I feel pretty stretched as it is............therefore the third part, wanting HIS hand on me - yes, Lord, please, put your hand on me, on my life, on our family, our home.

And lastly, keep me from evil. Not just get me through the tempting situations I allow myself to be in - but keep me from them altogether.

There's so much I want to talk about but I need to organize it a bit. If it's big theological issues you crave, you may want to simply move on - right now, I am swimming in the everyday of being a Momma. Right now, I'm thinking about Christmas devotions, our traditions and how to accomplish them in our tiny home. I'm thinking about how to reach my children's hearts, not just their behavior. I'm just trying to get myself to bed each night before 2am.......

Luv to you all ~ I know it's been kinda bare around here lately. Hang in there - come January, we'll all be encouraged to get organized, get back to basics, get in the Word, you name it. And a bit more time to deal with too!
*Michigan Momma*


Janet said...


Mama said...

I feel exactly like that too except I have 8 kiddos(big and little as you say:) and it seems that doing anything other than maintaining is a waste of time! If I do actual cleaning it gets dirtied the same day and looks as though I havent scrubbed anything in a week! So I've resigned myself to doing anything other than maintaining when it is absoloutely needed! Anything more than that is useless! Us busy moms just have to re-evaluate our standards sometimes and establish what it is that we can be comfortable with and work on those things instead of trying to maitain a standard we had with lets say...when we had one childs etc. Hope that helps....and I'm right there in the trenches of motherhood too:)!!

Theresa said...

I'm prayin' for ya! Hang in there. Did I miss where you're moving to? Closer to me?! LOL!