Could it simply be how things are? Is it a test of my faith and trust in the Lord? If so, will I allow it to become a temptation to self-pity and wallow in "poor-me's"??
Here's the deal:
Sunday evening, my dh basically runs to bed, shivering uncontrollably, and falls asleep with a fever (he may have taken some meds before hitting the pillow). We wake up Monday, with big ol' plans to make a trip to IKEA *without* our children (being watched by a wonderful family with 6 of their own children - what a blessing!). I was excited.....my dh was sick.
I spent the first half of the day semi-upset 'cause my poor dh wasn't acting all happy and excited about our "big day out". (He was sick, hello?!) But I had been looking forward to this day and really only had eyes for Lori, apparently. I tried to straighten out my focus, get my eyes off myself and realise how he must feel ~ so the rest of the day went...better (well, I'm not *perfect*!).
We actually got lots accomplished at IKEA ~ got our linens, including a new duvet cover for our bed (whoo-hoo!), lots of pillows, including an ergonomic pillow for me and really nice ones for my dh (again, whoo-hoo!), some floor mats, some kid's room wall shelves, other odds-n-ends......plus meatballs, sauce and lingonberries!! Yum!
Afterwards, my feet were like HUMONGOUS sausages! It was terrible! Yet I wasn't in pain (other than sporadic contractions.....not really terribly painful). I was just glad to have one more thing to check off of my list.
Speaking of my list ~ how come it doesn't seem to be getting any smaller, huh?? Weird..... ;)
I guess, in the back of my head, I figured my dh would be better by the next day. He hardly ever takes off work and doesn't really give himself much sick-time (what parent does, really?). Nope. He made a doctor's appointment the very next morning (Tues) - which I had encouraged him to do, if he still felt bad, as I didn't want his sickness to get worse. You know, something horrible like strep or pneumonia....
You know, something horrible, like strep....
And as it turns out, our doc wants our little ones to be checked out if they show ANY symptoms ~ he wants them treated. Well, little Elijah sounded pretty sick these last few days, but I don't really take 'em in unless it's bad: a bad fever, if it lasts too long, etc. So I called and made an appointment for him tomorrow morning (Wed).
Then right before bed, Isaac told his father, "Daddy, why can't I stop s-s-s-s-s-h-h-h-h-h-aking?". Yup, he too had a fever, along with the chills. Exactly how Dean's sickness started. Poor baby. He got some fever meds and I plan on taking him to the doctor's tomorrow as well.
Thus far, all of us girls are holding out. We'll see....
ALL OF THAT TO SAY,
I'm trying, trying, *trying* not to fall into all that silly self-pity. You know, "Why is this happening to ME?" "Doesn't God know I'm having major surgery in less than a week?" "I have too much to do to nurse all these people back to health as well" "AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
God knows I'm pregnant. God knows I'm having major surgery. God knows strep is very contagious and icky. Yet still we are going through this. So go through it we will. And I pray I will learn exactly what God has for me through all of this. I'm thinking it has to do with my focus, my selfishness, my control-issues, my obsessiveness, yada, yada, yada ;) Yup, I need LOTS of help~
So I will continue to take my vitamins, my ACV/honey tonic, drink tons of water, my probiotics, etc.......and pray for God to keep me healthy and strong!! I will pray God heals my family *quickly*!! And I will pray for God to get me through day by day, moment by moment, with my eyes on the LORD! Praise Him that He is the Blessed Controller of all things~
YEAH!! Lil' one in just about 5 days~